Thursday, August 28, 2014


Georgia State defeated Abeliene Abielene Abelene Abilene Christian last night 38-37
Way to let the damn state down already, Abilene. The state of Kansas is now 0-1 in FBS play. That will probably change to 1-1 by Saturday, then theoretically 3-1 by next Saturday (but don't sleep on SEMO State, they can pull it off)

Anyway, it's the beginning of a new season and I'm excited. I'm excited and far too optimistic, especially considering the fact that my favorite team won three games last year, finally beat another team in conference for the first time since 2010, and actually looked like it had some sort of positive momentum at points in the season. So hey, it's August 28th, and the Jayhawks are undefeated. Here's what I think is going to happen.

The Official Big XII Preview. 
Start at the top:
1. Baylor
I like to buck trends even when it seems like I shouldn't, just like Oklahoma likes to be not good when they're supposed to be good. I know Oklahoma's supposed to be the best team in the conference this year. I watched them win the Sugar Bowl last year. I had just ingested a meal from Culvers, having seen everyone else in my family be sick and swearing to my father that I wasn't sick, then slowly realized that I was sick on the way home from Culvers, then I laid down on my couch to attempt to stave off the vomiting while Oklahoma still had a chance oh my god, then around the middle of the fourth quarter, I started vomiting, went upstairs to tell my family (they were watching Anchorman) and then returned downstairs to the couch to see Oklahoma actually winning the game. It was crazy. Oklahoma didn't let everyone down for once (realize that since Texas' national championship in 2005, Oklahoma had won as many BCS bowl games as both Oklahoma State and Kansas). Anyway Baylor won a bunch last year and they're gonna do it again this year! And they get KU at home!
2. Oklahoma
See the Baylor post. I know nothing about Baylor
3. Kansas State
See, if I had any confidence in myself, I'd put Kansas State at number 2, maybe even at number 1 because they're probably going to be that good, knowing K-State and all. Not "win a national championship" good, but they finally won a bowl game last year, a first since I could understand how to multiply numbers, so they're on the right track. Initially, I was just going to write "It's Kansas State." for the whole entry but I wrote so little on Baylor which led to me writing so little about Oklahoma so I figured I needed to write something about K-State. I actually wouldn't be surprised if Bill Snyder were immortal, honestly I wouldn't be surprised if he were a deity of some sort who just happened to coach football. I wouldn't be surprised if we look back at civil war era photos some day and we see an elderly man in a purple tracksuit. I mean he looks almost the same as he did 20 years ago.
4. Oklahoma State
Their stadium smells like gunpowder, also it's walled in from all four sides, which is crazy, like you're playing in the middle of a business district, gets very loud. They have that thing with the paddles and it's cool. Also they're typically really, really good each year and I don't think they're gonna break that anytime soon. In 20 years I'm gonna write the same thing about Mike Gundy that I did about Bill Snyder in the K-State section, except it'll be like "Oh yeah, he's aged quite a bit since 20 years ago, certainly not 40 anymore" (never mention your age in any quotable instance because everyone will bring it up forever)
5. Texas Tech
Texas Tech is somehow going to beat one of the four teams ranked in front of it right here (my money's on K-State and Oklahoma), then rise up to the Top 5 in the polls, then blow it against someone at home or at Iowa State. That's Lubbock for you, best team doesn't win in Lubbock.
6. Iowa State
This is Iowa State's year to win six games on strong defense and upset somebody somehow, then maybe lose at Kansas, because it seems like it's going to be that kind of year.
7. Taxes
I don't think Charlie Strong is going to have a bad time at Texas. In fact, I think his time at Texas is going to be very successful. He's a great coach, but at such a high level program like Texas, he might have some issues. He might also not have some issues and in that case they should be up around 2 or 3.
8. TCU
I know literally nothing about TCU
9. Kansas
I can dream. Not big, but hey, I can dream. This would be the first time that KU wouldn't be at the bottom of the conference since 2010. This will likely require an away victory, which they could possibly get at Duke or at West Virginia, a couple of conference victories, which they could get against Iowa State or TCU or even Texas? (My friend Alden agrees with me on this, it's Charlie Strong's first game in the Big XII and it could be upset territory) (Also that will be the first game I have seen featuring two coaches named Charlie). Is four wins a possibility? Five? I think that KU can get six wins without shocking the world. I certainly hope so! Please!
10. West Virginia
I don't know how they ended up so low. Sorry Joel :/

I don't even know if this is how I actually think about anything anymore, I'd love to think it'll be different this year and the 4-team playoff is Baylor, UCLA, LSU, and Michigan State, but I know for a fact we're going to end up with the most boring thing ever, probably Alabama, Florida State, Ohio State, and Oklahoma. Stay tuned for the NFL preview. (There will not be an NFL preview)

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